3 Women walking down the beach....

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Three ladies were out for a walk on the beach...

A man was sitting on a blanket at the beach. He had no arms and no legs.

as the Three women, from England , Wales and Ireland came walking past and felt sorry for the poor man.

The English woman said "Have you ever had a hug?" The man said "No," so she gave him a hug and walked on.

The Welsh woman said, "Have you ever had a kiss?" The man said, "No," so she gave him a kiss and walked on.

The Irish woman came to him and said, "'ave ya ever been f#$ked, laddie?" The man broke into a big smile and said, "No".

She said, "Aye, ya will be when the tide comes in." LOLOLOLOLOL LMAOF

[dirt dame 561]

[Mistress of the dual 1]

I got this one sent to me today that I haven't heard before:

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend to Husband and noticed a distinct slowdown in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend.

In addition, Husband uninstalled many other valuable programmes, such as Romance and Personal Attention and then installed undesirable programs such as Rugby, Football, Sailing and Continuous TV. Conversation no longer runs, and Housecleaning simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?

Signed, Desperate

Dear Desperate,

First keep in mind, Boyfriend is an Entertainment Package, while Husband is an Operating System. Please enter the command: 'http: I Thought You Loved Me.html' and try to download Tears. Don't forget to install the Guilt update. If that application works as designed, Husband should then automatically run the applications Jewellery and Flowers, but remember - overuse of the above application can cause Husband to default to Grumpy Silence, Garden Shed or Beer. Beer is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.

Also, do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband.

In summary, Husband is a great system, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. It also tends to work better running one task at a time. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Food and Hot Lingerie.

Good Luck,

Tech Support

[christi20 0]

LOVE IT!

haha

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A better one Mistress: Well done.

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Another good one.

http://www.glamisdunes.com/invision/index.php?showtopic=234378&hl=